We all like to make other people happy, its part of being a social creature. However, when you are focusing on people-pleasing and not caring for yourself it can cause stress and resentment. Not to mention that relying on other people’s approval for your self-esteem is a losing battle!

When you accept yourself and believe in your value you start to fall in love with you. Building your self-esteem not only helps you lead a happier, more authentic life, but also improves your relationships with others. Here are some tips to get you started:

1.  Say “no” – Setting boundaries with others sends the message to them and yourself that you expect and deserve respect. We teach other people how to treat us.

2.  Don’t compare yourself – In the age of social media its easy to get lost in comparing ourselves to other people. This can make you start to feel less than other people and feel you aren't doing as well as you should. Keep in mind we often only see the highlights of other's lives and forget they have some of the same struggles we do.

3.  Know who you are – Invest in discovering or clarifying exactly who you are. What are your dreams, goals, values, likes, dislikes? If you don’t have a solid sense of who you are, it will be impossible to love yourself.

4.  Be honest with yourself – Its hard to love someone when they are less than truthful or trying to hide things about themselves. The same goes for self-love. When we can take responsibility for our actions and clearly see our strengths and weaknesses we more easily love ourselves.

5.  Don’t be too critical – Being honest is helpful, but being critical is not. While it is important to acknowledge areas we want to improve, don’t beat yourself up about them. Practice accepting where you are in your journey and loving your imperfections.

6.  Forgive yourself – Sometimes we get caught up in a cycle of regret. We look at mistakes we made, opportunities we missed, transgressions, and we start to live in a world of regret for past actions. Hindsight is 20/20 and if you are caught in the past you aren’t living in the present. Remember that your past self did the best they could with the tools they had - cut yourself some slack.

7.  Be ok with other people not liking you – I know, its inconceivable that someone wouldn’t like you – you know you’re great! But, some people just don’t mesh well together, and that’s ok. Respecting yourself means being authentic, even if that means someone may not like you.

8.  Get rid of the haters – Staying in toxic relationships, letting a friend put you down all the time, whatever the situation may be, it isn’t healthy to be around people who do not treat you with respect. You are worthy of kindness, love, respect and you should surround yourself with people who recognize your worth.